how to have sex for long time - #37219
I am kind of at my wits end here... I've been dating someone amazing for a few months, but I've been having trouble with how to have sex for long time. Like, we start off great, but after a while, I just can’t seem to keep going! The last time, I felt super embarrassed because it ended way too soon and I can tell that it bothered my partner. It's not that I don't want to, it's just like I go from feeling excited to kinda overwhelmed and then it's over before I know it. I’ve tried some breathing techniques that I read about but they don’t seem to be helping much. And I even thought about switching positions or taking breaks, you know, but that just seems to disrupt the mood sometimes. I don’t wanna keep disappointing them. Is there something specific in Ayurveda, like herbs or practices, that could help me figure out how to have sex for long time? I've heard about natural supplements but not sure what to trust or if those would even work for me. Plus, if anyone has tips on mental focus — like how to stay in the moment and not overthink things — that would be awesome! I just want to enjoy this and make sure we both have a great time together without cutting it short. Any help at all would be much loved!
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Doctors’ responses
In Ayurveda, concerns like maintaining sexual stamina often relate to balancing your doshas, particularly Vata and Pitta doshas. It seems these imbalances might be affecting your stamina and mental focus. Let’s dive into some natural remedies and practices that could help elongate your experience and enhance pleasure for both parties involved.
Herbs and Supplements: Ayurveda offers a range of herbs that can be beneficial. Ashwagandha is known for its ability to reduce stress and support stamina, take it with warm milk (preferably in the evening). You can also consider Kapikachhu, which enhances sexual performance and increases libido. A teaspoon of its powder mixed with milk or warm water once a day is suggested. However, consult with an Ayurvedic practitioner to ensure these are right for you.
Dietary Changes: Adjusting your diet subtly could have a pronounced impact. Consuming warm, nourishing foods, like ghee, nuts, avocados, and dairy, helps build Ojas (vital energy), improving endurance. Avoid excess caffeine, spicy foods, and cold meals that might aggravate Vata. Hydration is key — sip on warm water through the day.
Routine and Practice: Daily Abhyanga (self-massage with oils like sesame or almond oil) can stabilize Vata, promoting relaxation and reducing performance anxiety. Also consider yoga postures such as Yoga Nidra and Pranayama (particularly Nadi Shodhana - alternate nostril breathing) to center your mind and remain present during intimacy.
Mental Focus: Work on mindfulness techniques, like focusing actively on the sensations and feelings rather than the act itself to lessen anxieties or thoughts that pop up. Meditation, even for just a few minutes daily, can train your mind to stay in the moment.
Lastly, remember, it’s crucial to discuss and communicate with your partner about what’s working and not working. It alleviates pressure and ensures mutual understanding. Should symptoms persist or if it causes significant stress, consider talking with a healthcare professional who can provide more insights or explore additional routes.

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