When Should a Child See a Child Psychologist, and How Do You Find a Good One?

Question

My 8-year-old son has been struggling with severe anxiety and mood swings, and I’m starting to wonder if he needs to see a child psychologist. At first, I thought it was just normal childhood behavior—kids get nervous, they have bad days, and sometimes they just don’t want to talk. But in the past few months, I’ve noticed some big changes that have me really worried.

He used to love going to school, but now he begs me to let him stay home. He keeps saying that his stomach hurts, but when we went to the doctor, they found nothing wrong. I’ve read that anxiety can cause physical symptoms, and I’m wondering if that’s what’s happening here. He also cries more often, even over small things, and seems to get overwhelmed easily.

The hardest part is that he doesn’t know how to explain what’s wrong. When I ask him, he just shrugs or says, “I don’t know.” He’s also been having trouble sleeping, waking up in the middle of the night and coming to my room because he says he’s scared. I don’t know what’s causing this sudden change—there hasn’t been any major trauma or big life event that I can think of.

At what point do you take a child to see a child psychologist? I don’t want to overreact, but I also don’t want to ignore signs that he might be struggling with something deeper. What are the red flags that a child needs professional help?

Also, how do you even find a good child psychologist? There are so many therapists out there, and I don’t know what to look for. Should I choose someone who specializes in anxiety? Or is it better to go with a general psychologist who can evaluate everything first?

I’m also curious about natural ways to help him. Are there Ayurvedic remedies for childhood anxiety? I’ve heard that certain herbs and dietary changes can help with emotional balance—has anyone tried this?

If you’ve taken your child to a child psychologist, I’d love to hear about your experience. Did it help? How did you explain therapy to your child? I just want to do what’s best for him and make sure he gets the support he needs.

Dr. Harsha Joy · Accepted Answer

In Ayurveda, childhood anxiety is often seen as an imbalance in the mind-body connection, and addressing it involves both emotional and physical support. Ayurvedic herbs like Brahmi and Ashwagandha can help calm the mind and reduce stress, while Shankhapushpi is used for mental clarity and emotional balance. A diet rich in warm, nourishing foods, like soups, grains, and milk, can also help stabilize his emotions and support his overall health. In addition, practices like gentle yoga, breathing exercises (pranayama), and regular sleep routines can help reduce anxiety and promote relaxation. If anxiety persists and significantly impacts his daily life, seeing a child psychologist is a good idea. Red flags for professional help include ongoing emotional distress, inability to function in daily activities (like school or friendships), and physical symptoms (like stomachaches or sleep disturbances) that don’t have a medical cause. When choosing a therapist, look for someone who specializes in working with children and understands childhood anxiety—often a psychologist with experience in child development and behavioral therapy is ideal. Open communication with your child and a calm approach can help them feel safe about therapy and encourage positive engagement.

Dr Sujal Patil · Answer

It sounds like your son is experiencing significant anxiety, and you’re absolutely right to take his symptoms seriously. Frequent school avoidance, unexplained physical symptoms (like stomach aches), excessive crying, difficulty sleeping, and trouble articulating emotions are all signs that he may need professional support. Children often express anxiety physically because they may not have the words to describe their feelings. While some level of anxiety is normal, when it starts interfering with daily life, school, or relationships, it’s a strong indicator that a child psychologist could be helpful. A professional can assess whether his anxiety is within a typical range or if it points to generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), separation anxiety, or another emotional challenge.

When looking for a child psychologist, consider one who specializes in childhood anxiety or cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), which is highly effective for kids with anxiety. You might start with a general child psychologist for an evaluation, and if needed, they can refer you to a specialist. Look for someone with experience in play therapy, mindfulness techniques, and family counseling, as these approaches often work well with younger children. Reading reviews, asking for recommendations from your pediatrician, or checking with your child’s school counselor can also help. When introducing therapy, frame it as a safe place where he can talk and learn tools to feel better, rather than something being "wrong" with him.

If you’re interested in natural remedies, Ayurveda has approaches that may support emotional balance. Brahmi and Ashwagandha are traditionally used for stress and cognitive support, though it’s best to consult an Ayurvedic practitioner before giving herbs to children. Simple changes like reducing processed foods, ensuring enough magnesium (from nuts, seeds, and leafy greens), and adding warm, calming drinks like saffron milk may help. Massage with warm sesame oil or Brahmi oil before bedtime can also promote relaxation. Have you noticed whether certain foods or activities make his anxiety better or worse? Keeping a journal of his triggers and responses could provide helpful insights before seeing a professional.

When Should a Child See a Child Psychologist, and How Do You Find a Good One? - #15532

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