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Sexual Health & Disorders
Question #37743
119 days ago
373

how to last in bed - #37743

Nora

I am really frustrated. Lately, I’ve been having issues with lasting long enough in bed, and it’s starting to affect my relationship. I'm in my early thirties and until recently, never really thought much about this. But like, after a stressful month at work, it seems like things just changed overnight, right? I find that I’m really anxious and I don’t know if that’s part of the problem. I just feel this pressure to perform, which obviously doesn't help. I've tried some breathing techniques and even a few over-the-counter products, but they didn’t work at all. I was reading online and saw something about how Ayurveda has solutions for everything, including how to last in bed. Can anyone explain how Ayurvedic practices might help or suggest any herbs or remedies? I mean, maybe it’s all in my head or my doshas are off balance or something? I guess I'm looking for tips on how to last in bed, any dietary changes, lifestyle adjustments or traditional treatments that will help. Just want some normal and practical advice. Feeling a bit hopeless, honestly, so any thoughts would be appreciated!

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Doctors' responses

In Ayurveda, issues with stamina can often be connected to imbalances in your doshas or weakened agni (digestive fire). Given your situation, stress and anxiety might be leading to a disturbance in your Vata dosha. When Vata is out of balance, it can cause anxiety and restlessness, which don’t pair well with your goals in bed.

You mentioned feeling pressure to perform, which also ties into mental stress. To address this from an Ayurvedic perspective, first focus on grounding practices that can calm Vata. Daily abhyanga, or self-massage with warm sesame oil, can be extremely calming for the nervous system. Commit ten minutes every morning before showering, gently massaging the oil ito your skin with circular motions on the joints.

From a dietary perspective, consider incorporating warming and grounding foods. Pay attention to meals that include cooked vegetables, whole grains, nuts, and seeds. Black sesame seeds and almonds are particularly beneficial for enhancing sexual stamina. Ojas, the essence of health and vitality, can be increased said to be increased with warm milk blended with a pinch of saffron and a teaspoon of ashwagandha powder taken before bed.

Herbal remedies like Ashwagandha and Shatavari can be supportive in strengthening your tissues (dhatus) and boosting energy. Ashwagandha is particularly well-known for reducing stress and enhancing stamina. Take it mixed with warm milk in the evenings, about 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon as a starting point.

Deep breathing and meditation can also help in reducing anxiety - I suggest dedicating 10 minutes in the morning to practice alternate nostril breathing (Nadi Shodhana) for calming the mind.

Lastly, make sure your sleep is regulated. An erratic sleeping pattern exacerbates Vata imbalance, so aim to sleep and wake up at consistent times. Avoid using screens at least an hour before bed, as this can disrupt both sleep and natural rhythms. If your symptoms persist, consulting a local Ayurvedic practitioner for personalized guidance can be invaluable.

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It sounds like you’re dealing with a lot of stress and anxiety, which can definitely affect performance in bed. From an Ayurvedic perspective, this issue often relates to imbalances, especially within the vata and pitta doshas. Anxiety, restlessness, and pressure to perform can increase vata, while excess pitta may lead to irritability and frustration. Let’s focus on bringing these doshas back into harmony and strengthening your vitality.

First, consider incorporating Ashwagandha into your daily routine. This herb is renowned in Ayurveda for promoting relaxation and stamina. Take it in powder form—about 1/2 teaspoon mixed with warm milk—before bed. This can help calm the mind, reduce stress, and support a stronger reproductive system.

Dietary modifications can also play a significant role. Emphasize warm, nourishing foods like whole grains, cooked vegetables, and healthy fats such as ghee. Avoid excessively spicy, oily, or processed foods, as they can disturb your digestion and aggravate pitta. Consistency in meal timings and staying hydrated helps maintain a steady digestive fire (agni), crucial for overall vitality.

Incorporate relaxation techniques like yoga and meditation. A few simple poses, such as the cat-cow stretch or gentle forward bends, can invigorate the sexual energy while also calming the nervous system. Aim for around 15-20 minutes a day to reduce anxiety and balance vata.

Lifestyle adjustments are just as important. Prioritize quality sleep and establish a regular, calming bedtime routine. Consider self-massage (abhyanga) using warm sesame or coconut oil, especially around the reproductive area. This can improve circulation, stimulate the energy channels (nadis), and enhance vitality.

Overall, balancing your lifestyle, diet and adopting these Ayurvedic practices, you may see improvements over time. However, if you experience any persistent issues, consider seeking personalized guidance from a healthcare professional with experience in Ayurvedic medicine.

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Thank you so much for the advice! I’ll definitely give those a try. Really appreciate the clear suggestions, had no clue what to do before!
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This was super helpful, thank u! The advice was clear and simple to follow. Already feeling a bit better after a few days.
This was super helpful, thank u! The advice was clear and simple to follow. Already feeling a bit better after a few days.